Three Star Leadership

Understanding People

As a boss, you have to get things done through people. That's why you need quick and simple ways to improve your understanding of the people you work with. The resources in this section are divided into three groups.

• Social Styles Tools
• Emotional Intelligence Tools
• Neuro-Linguistic Programming Tools

Social Styles Tools

There are lots of resources out there on various, different social styles systems. I think that the best of these is The Platinum Rule: Discover the Four Basic Business Personalities and How They Can Lead You to Success by Tony Alessandra, Michael J. O'Connor for two reasons.

First, this is the only material on this subject that I'm aware of that gives you options. You get helpful overview of four basic styles that you can use in the field. And you get more detail to help you when you need it.

The other reason is that the book is exceptionally well written and supported by an excellent web site. There is an assessment instrument on the site that you can use to get insight into your own style.

Here are some other resources that can help you with this concept.

• Please Understand Me: Character and Temperament Types by David Keirsey and Marilyn Bates
• Type Talk at Work: How the 16 Personality Types Determine Your Success on the Job by Otto Kroeger, Janet M. Thuesen, and Hile Rutledge

Rick English is a lecturer in marketing at San Diego State University. He teaches a marketing class and includes Social Styles in his material. His support material for that class includes some helpful Social Styles material.

Suzanne Boswell is an author and trainer who specializes in working with dental practices. Don't her title, "Building the Dental Dream Team," put you off, though, if you're in a different business. This is an excellent quick introduction to the concepts of social styles and how they play out at work.

Emotional Intelligence

Working with people is at the heart of Supervisory Leadership. It would be wonderful if we were all talented in that area, but we're not. To help yourself get better, read Working with Emotional Intelligence by Daniel Goleman. Goleman is the originator of the Emotional Intelligence material. This book is a better choice for you than his first book, Emotional Intelligence because it was written to apply Goleman's findings to the workplace.

The web site for the Emotional Intelligence Consortium is the web presence for Goleman and the folks who work with him. There are lots of resources on this site.

Neuro-Linguistic Programming

Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) is the name of a set of techniques originally proposed by Richard Bandler and John Grinder to describe the relationship between mental images and communication processes. Some folks swear by it, claiming that NLP has made a major improvement in their communications and performance. Others swear at it, charging that there's no scientific basis for NLP and that its proponents are charlatans.

Luckily, you don't need to become embroiled in the debates to get some benefits from NLP material. My own experience is that there are things in NLP that will help you communicate more effectively, whether or not you buy into the entire theoretical framework. If you want to find out more, I suggest two books

Introducing Neuro-Linguistic Programming: Psychological Skills for Understanding and Influencing People by Joseph O'Connor and John Seymour is the class, most-recommended text. It's been around for a long time. The downside is that it's not really focused on workplace communication and is very, very dry. But if you want a good grounding in theory, this is the book of choice.

NLP at Work: The Difference That Makes a Difference in Business by Sue Knight is at the other end of the spectrum. It is directly focused on the workplace and personal development and quite well-written.

My guess is that if you like one of these books, you will not like the other. So look inside the book on Amazon, or review an actual copy before you buy.